Today Josh and I talked about Lucas…because the subject of friendship and suicide came up.

If I had one chance to talk to him one time, all I want to say is,

I’m sorry I couldn’t be there for you. I’m sorry for being such a selfish friend. I miss you so much.

Every time you come up in my mind, tears start falling.

And this is my punishment from you, is my forever aching heart towards you.

But, you are one of the reasons of motivation, to live, and to mature.

8th grade buddy, you will forever be inside my heart no matter I want it to be or not.

And honestly, it’s the worst punishment ever, but it’ll be a lesson forever, to me.

I love you buddy. You were a really great friend.

I guess I really can’t suppress you from my horrible memories.

But man, you really fucked up my head.